Quotes

"Science, ethics, and history should inform, not serve, politics."

~ Louis Hoffman

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"The deepest love is an honest love—a love strong enough to look at the other person seeing all their gifts and flaws, their strengths and imperfections. It is a weak love that can only exist when the other person is idealized.

~ Louis Hoffman. Letters for My Father: Grief, Love, and Self-Exploration (p. xx).

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“Self-acceptance too often is intertwined with attempts to rationalize ourselves as being right or justified in our mistakes instead of embracing our humanity as imperfect creatures. Authentic self-acceptance requires that we are honest with ourselves about responsibility. Instead of seeking to justify our mistakes, we embrace them.”
~ Louis Hoffman, 2014, A Cultural Crisis of Responsibility: Responding to a Denial of Our Humanity

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“In humanistic psychotherapy, empathy is more than a technique or foundation for establishing a good therapeutic alliance, it is healing in and of itself.”
~ Louis Hoffman, 2019, “Culture and Empathy in Humanistic Psychology” in Humanistic Approaches to Multiculturalism and Diversity, p. 111

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“Lu Xun is a good model for us. Although he is known more for his critiquing of the culture and ideas of his time, a closer reading shows that he greatly values history and tradition. He honored and revered his culture and the people of China. Yet, he was very critical when people became bound to their ideas. There must be balance. We must revere, but not over-revere; we must honor, but not create idols; we must critique, but not destroy; we must preserve, but not stagnate. This honors history and tradition. Yet, many who seek to preserve tradition destroy it by holding on too tightly. We must let our history be freer than this.”
~ Louis Hoffman, 2014, The Proper Use of Tradition and Scholarly Authority

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“We are quick to debate and assert a correct position, slow to ask questions and seek to understand. And even our questions, when they are asked, are really just trickery, pretending to seek understanding while seeking to find a weakness in the position of the other. Such processes serve no constructive purposes; they only tear down and reinforce what we believe we know to be truth.”
~ Louis Hoffman, 2014, The Proper Use of Tradition and Scholarly Authority

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". . . it is not possible to separate the need for social change from the therapeutic context."

~ Louis Hoffman, Heatherlyn Cleare-Hoffman, Nathaniel Granger, Jr., & David St. John, "Introduction," Humanistic Approaches to Multiculturalism and Diversity: Perspectives on Existence and Difference (p. 6).

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"Grieving is sacred process. It mixes sorrow and joy, loss and gratefulness. There are aspects of grieving that I enjoy, and aspects that are devastating. These are intimately connected."
~ Louis Hoffman. Letters for My Father: Grief, Love, and Self-Exploration (p. vi).

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"Social justice issues often arise when groups, on a collective level, are forced to confront aspects of the givens of existence due to social structures or impositions. These can include threats to one’s self or existence, being cut off from sources of meaning or relationship, or limitations being imposed on one’s political freedom, which necessarily has implications for one’s existential freedom."
~ Louis Hoffman, Nathaniel Granger, Jr., Lisa Vallejos (now L. Xochitl Vallejos), & Michael Moats, "An Existential-Humanistic Perspective on Black Lives Matter and Contemporary Protest Movements"

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"What prevents normal and existential guilt from becoming neurotic is one’s ability to stay with the guilt, listen to its message, and act responsibly. When one can remain with existential or normal guilt, one can creatively utilize guilt by allowing it to energize and direct one toward the causes of guilt."
~ Louis Hoffman, "White Privilege, Social Justice, and Existential Psychology"

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"Similar to other religious and spiritual revolutionaries, Jesus message of love for everyone was so radical that it was considered dangerous—dangerous enough that he was killed for it. It was a threat to the status quo and a critique of the power structures of his time. Today, such ideas of radical love, compassion, and empathy are again being viewed as heresy, unpatriotic, and dangerous—even anti-Christian."
~ Louis Hoffman

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"Death is one of the great illuminators, often compelling us to self-reflection."
~ Louis Hoffman. Letters for My Father: Grief, Love, and Self-Exploration (p. viii)

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"Maybe a life without regrets is not worth living. If one has no regrets, then maybe they have never lived freely."

~ Louis Hoffman. Letters for My Father: Grief, Love, and Self-Exploration (p. x)

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'Grieving is not something that we do, but something we live.

~ Louis Hoffman. Letters for My Father: Grief, Love, and Self-Exploration (p. xv)

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". . . if I wanted to be good at love, I needed to be good at grief. And I deeply wanted to be good at loving with all my being."

~ Louis Hoffman. Letters for My Father: Grief, Love, and Self-Exploration (p. 165)

 

"There is an unfathomable beauty and transcendent freedom in learning that loving deeply is worth being broken, even shattered. It is through being willing to suffer that I learned the power of relational depth, learned to love deeply. I will not be afraid of being broken on the other side of love."

~ Louis Hoffman. Letters for My Father: Grief, Love, and Self-Exploration (p. 166)

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"When we are broken, there are aspects of ourselves hidden in our day-to-day life that are revealed. Even the most self-aware person will at times be surprised by what they find when the blows of life expose us to ourselves. Grief with the interplay of loss and facing mortality can reveal precious aspects of who we are."
~ Louis Hoffman. Letters for My Father: Grief, Love, and Self-Exploration (p. 174).

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